Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Losing yourself

I've always wanted to be a Mom. I was not ready up until about a year ago. People ask how do you know when you are ready? I don't really have an answer for that.

I found the guy, we are financially stable and it just felt like the right time.

Part of me realizes that I am a very selfish person. I have pretty much always gotten what I wanted. The idea that someone will come before me scares the living daylights out of me.

I have always made fun of my friends that have given their whole life fo their children. It is sometimes hard to have adult conversations with these friends without interruptions.

I wonder, will I become uninteresting to my friends without kids?

I have always felt lucky that I can have time to myself when on the phone or just sleeping in. All of that is about to change in three months.

Boy am I scared.

I even wanted to avoid talking about my pregnancy when I started this blog. I think I was a bit in denial about the fact that it has changed me.

I've spent hours researching things like carseats and strollers. I worry that my next car purchase won't be safe enough for my kids. Weird things that I never thought about before.

For my friends that don't have kids, feel free to tell me if you don't want to hear about my baby. I would understand because I have been there. Just go easy and remember that I'm still me. Crazy, self absorbed Shannon.


Alison said...

Being A Mother... will be just another great part of you!!

Mommy Moreno said...

I think the other comment says it best; "its just another great part of your life that makes you, YOU!"